insights - the power of love

funny thing.. love is
changes a person drastically. makes u give up everything juz to be wif that other half. wans the best for the other party. boils up jealousy like a hot cauldron of stew.

i see myself in love with a guy. his name's terence. though he doesn't offer me much and the future seems bleak, i grow in affections for him. he's trusts me wif so much hope, so much loyalty, that it sometimes irritates me y he doesn't bother. true i've stepped way beyond the boundary sometimes. gone astray like lost kittens in the vast worldly desires of human creations, yet he's always there when each nite i needed someone to whine at, or to give me moral support. the freedom i enjoy wif him is so intoxicating. dun get me wrong. he gives me more freedom then even a bird can desire. this is probably the best trait and the worst trait in him. he holds me so loosely i sometimes wanna tear away from the string attached wif him so that he can hold onto it tighter.

i love him wif each passing day. funny how time flies. it was juz yest we had our first date. now that a year has past by, we've grown to understand each other's wants, temprements and even desires.
i'll love to hope for a future beyond wad we have in front of us. but to reach that future would mean having to have abundance of luck in terms of wealth, health and support from everyone ard us.

sometimes in the night i wake to find myself thinking of him, holding him close to me. he's my big darling teddy bear, my soulmate (i hope) for life... but the quest to such ambitious thoughts are always a rocky one. setbacks and arguements repeatedly arises between us, that we sometimes had juz enough of each other.

individually, i've allowed my thoughts to wander away from him... imagining a new life wif yet another. yet its not everyday that wad u wan is wad u get. life isn't so simple like ABC and i learnt that moderation is the best policy.

now that we have already grown a year into the future together as one, i hope for more years to come by. each time n moment i tink of him, i miss him so badly. my heart aches and my arms long to hold him close to me. nobody can understand wad we've between us. onlookers juz put down our relationship as weak and uncertain.

he's the one guy who i know that can accept me for my disabilities, for my horrible temper and nasty personality, for loving me even after a long nite of partying, for trusting me and allowing me to venture and having so much more freedom then others do, for understanding my needs and trying to accomodate wif it, for the numerous kisses on my forehead telling me he love me, for the cranky jokes that he likes to crack leading me to return a (=.=) face to him, for lightening up my life in every other ways.

he may not be mr perfect or have everything that makes him worth keeping beside me, but love is undescribable, unexplainable and a weird mystery. no matter how much i may complain abt him and his behaviour, his horrendous bo chap attitude, his absurdly unexcitable character... at the end, i'm still loving him to bits. i must be mad or this must surely be the power of love